


Together we sang

by enbyseer



Category: Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: ALSO GMAN I FORGOT TO TAG HIM THO LMAO, M/M, They/Themrey, Trans Male Character, everyone minus tommy darnold josh and gordon are just mentioned, theyre all trans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 19:02:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28730124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enbyseer/pseuds/enbyseer
Summary: Freelatta yearning moments. They're both dumb and oblivious.Title is from Ready Now by dodie!
Relationships: Tommy Coolatta/Gordon Freeman
Comments: 2
Kudos: 30





	Together we sang

**Author's Note:**

> started this in november. havent had a lot of motivation to write so I apologize if this isnt great lmao

It's hard to hide stuff from your roommate, especially feelings. It's hard to hide your heart rate going up everytime he places a hand on your shoulder, your smile everytime he laughs, your blush everytime he drunkenly flirts with you. Tommy knew all of it all too well. He was glad they got a two bedroom apartment, he had a little space to himself. He sighed as closed his eyes, looking up at the ceiling decorated with glow-in-the-dark stars. He could only see Gordon's dumb, beautiful face. He was in deep. But how could you tell someone that? 'Hey I'm madly in love with you and I have been ever since I saw you for the first time, not even the first time we met I mean the first time I finally saw you at your locker'? You can just say that. This fucking sucked. Tommy talked to everyone about this, he needed advice but every single piece he got wasn't what he wanted to hear. He often prayed that Benrey would act first, take Gordon away so he wouldn't have to worry about these stupid feelings. But Benrey never did, they never acted on their feelings either. Tommy knew Benrey wouldn't ever, he knew they knew that Gordon didn't like them like that. Benrey knew it was never going to work. Tommy? He knew there could be something between them, but he was scared it would fade away. Gordon would only like him for a bit and move on, realizing they were only destined to be friends.   
Tommy sat up, calling Sunkist up to his bed. Maybe cuddling her would make him feel better, it usually did. He'd turn on a movie he'd seen too many times and forget about the man only a few rooms away. Yeah, that was a good plan. He would just sleep it away like he always did.

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Tommy awoke to the sound of knocking on his door. "Breakfast!" Gordon spoke, muffled by the wood between them. "Gh wh- I-I'll be out soon! Just, woke up."   
"Alright, be quick though I can't keep it warm forever." He teased as he walked away. Tommy let out a small laugh and got up, putting on the usual stay at home outfit, a pepsi crop top and sweatpants, and left the room. He let Sunkist leave first, knowing she would want to see Joshua before he had to leave for school. He stretched as he walked to the small kitchen table, letting out a yawn before sitting down. Gordon placed a plate of pancakes and bacon and a cup of coffee down in front of him, taking the seat right next to him immediately after. "Pancakes /and/ bacon? Freeman treating is me this morning." Tommy teased and Gordon winked in response, taking a sip of his own coffee. They both let out a laugh, Tommy covering his mouth in attempt to hide his blush. They were silent after that, only taking in the sound of the coffee machine brewing their later cups and the sound of Joshua playing with Sunkist. It was nice. They shot glances at each other, occasionally catching the other staring. But neither one picked up on the red that was tinted on their cheeks.

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Gordon buckled Joshua into the backseat of the car, making sure he had all his stuff and was safe. Once he knew for sure his son was okay, he closed the door and waved at him. Gordon didn't know why he did it but he'd been doing it forever. Gordon got into the driver seat and did the same thing he had done to Josh but, for himself of course. He adjusted the rearview mirror so he could see Joshua as he spoke. "Excited for today? Picture day is a big day, y'know."   
"I am!!" Josh replied excitedly, slapping his hands onto his knees. Gordon let out a laugh. "Good, I can't wait to see them."  
Joshua was in 2nd grade now. It seemed unbelievable to everyone, especially Gordon. He wasn't always there with Josh, with working at Black Mesa and custody being a bitch. But now, he worked at home and had full custody. He was finally able to see his baby everyday and he never once took it for granted. Of course his ex was still able to see Josh, usually took him every other weekend. But Gordon demanded constant updates, he needed to know his son was safe. If his ex ever had a problem with it, Gordon always pulled the "I gave birth to him, I deserve to know where he is." sentence which always worked because, it was true.  
Gordon looked back at Josh as they drove, smiling at his son playing with a fidget toy Tommy had given him. It was sweet, the things that Tommy did for them. He never had to do anything for them but he always did. He didn't have to move in with them, he didn't have to take care of Joshua as if he was his own, he didn't have to care so much. But he did. Gordon was grateful for it, he really was. He knew Tommy was a good friend but sometimes he couldn't help but wish he were more. That probably sounded dumb to everyone else, but he couldn't help but have these feelings for Tommy. He was so sweet and caring, and pretty. How could you /not/ have something for Tommy. Gordon probably knew it was obvious to everyone that he had a thing for him, especially when he got to drinking. Dumb, unfiltered flirting. He was surprised Tommy never picked up on it, or maybe he did and just doesn't feel the same. God, he really hoped it wasn't that. "Focus, Gordon, focus." He mumbled to himself as he cleared his mind.

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You know it's bad when you have to ask your father to come over to talk about your dumb feelings. But, maybe it was needed. Tommy knew his dad wasn't, normal so why bother trying to have a normal father/son relationship.   
"I just feel so, dumb! I'm 37 and I feel like I'm 12 all over again.." Tommy complained as he shoved his hands onto his face, letting out a exasperated sigh. "You're not, dumb, Thomas. I promise you." G-Man spoke the way he always did, but for some reason it felt way more. Antagonizing.   
Tommy looked up at him from the cracks of his fingers, not saying a word.  
"You should talk to him, you need to stop. Hiding it away."  
"Yeah, yeah. I know."   
The front door swung open and G-Man looked up, making eye contact with Gordon. "Speak, of the devil." Man Tommy just wanted to punch him for that.  
It was an awkward few seconds before they broke eye contact and Gordon made his way over to the table. Okay, the few seconds continued with silence between the three of them. Gordon would never admit it to G-Man's face but he scared the /shit/ out of him. He knew he was capable to do like, just about anything he wanted, the world was at his finger tips. That shit was terrifying to have knowledge of. Sometimes Gordon wondered if Tommy was the same, being his son and all. Even though they didn't look related they both confirmed that Tommy is very much biological. "Greetings, Dr. Freeman." G-Man spoke up, breaking the soul crushing silence. "Uh, hey! Didn't know you were coming over. Would've cleaned the place up a bit."  
"There is no need to worry, it was. Unexpected for me as well. Thomas just, wanted to talk about things. Face to face."  
Tommy placed his face into his hands again, trying not to let out a groan. He couldn't think of anything to say, but he knew Gordon would question what was going on in the messed up brain of his. "Ah, I guess that's understandable! Some things can't be talked about over call or even text, y'know?" Gordon smiled a little while letting out an awkward chuckle. Yep, he'll try to talk to Tommy after G-Man leaves.   
The two of them chatted a little, Tommy occasionally slipping into the conversation but mainly choosing to stay in his own thoughts. It was about 45 minutes later that G-Man decided it was time for him to leave, but not before making plans for breakfast with his son in the next coming days. It was nice, but Tommy knew what kind of questions were going to be asked.  
"So," Gordon said while closing the door, facing Tommy who was right beside him. "What were y'all talking about? Did I do something?"  
"Wh? N-No! I promise it wasn't about you, just other things on my mind, y'know? When you came in we, were talking about you but nothing bad I promise, truly."  
There was a silence between them again, but Gordon wasn't going to push it. When Tommy wanted to talk he'd talk. "Alright. Hey, game 'n movie night with the science team tonight? We haven't done much as a group as of late, thought it might be nice."  
"Yeah, that sounds like fun!"  
"Sweet. Josh is going to stay with my ex for the night, making up for the missed weekend."

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Everything went as planned, and unplanned. But in a good way. The plan was not to have any drinks but Coomer must've not been informed, but Gordon didn't mind. He wouldn't tell any of them but man did he want to drink tonight. They decided on doing a mixture of 'virtual' games and board games, and uno. You can never have a game night without uno. The living room was full of laughter and random songs playing, usually whatever Benrey wanted to listen to but none of the other's seemed to mind the music choice of the night. As Tommy drank more throughout the night, the more he couldn't stop himself from staring at Gordon. He seemed so, happy. Like, he was comfortable and home. Not just physically but mentally. Gordon was happy, not even for an act. His smile lifted up his glasses a bit and his teeth showed through his lips. His eyes sparkled as he chuckled at Bubby's dumb jokes and he howled at Coomer's quiplash answers. Tommy couldn't help but be pulled in even more than usual. And everyone minus Gordon noticed. Gordon wasn't always super oblivious to things, but tipsy Gordon was. You could probably tell him you wanted to marry him on the spot and he'd laugh it off. He never noticed Tommy's face go red with every compliment he gave, every flirt he spoke, he never noticed anything. Tommy was thankful for that.

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The night was winding down. Bubby and Coomer were long gone and Benrey was saying their goodbyes. It was 2 in the morning, but it still felt early enough where Tommy and Gordon didn't bother to sleep. They wanted to be around each other more, play some two play uno and drink what was left of their few bottles. The room filled with silent laughter and soft music playing from Tommy's phone. He just decided to put on a random playlist, something soft that was easy to tune out but also still listen to. It was nice. "Hey," Gordon blurted out, setting his cards down and standing up from the floor. "Dance with me." He finished as he held out his hand, wating for Tommy to take it in his. Tommy didn't think twice and instantly grabbed it, standing up as well. Gordon wrapped his free hand around Tommy's waist, moving him closer. Tommy let his other hand do whatever, but usually kept it on Gordon's shoulder. They didn't speak. They didn't need to. They rocked back and forth to the song, sometimes mindlessly mumbling the lyrics. Tommy looked down to look Gordon in the eyes, which was easy because Gordon was already staring. The eye contact stuck for a few seconds before Tommy placed his hand on Gordon's cheek, stroking it with his thumb. They both didn't know who went in first but they both knew that they're lips were together, and they didn't plan on breaking them up anytime soon. Gordon pushed Tommy down to the couch so he wouldn't have to strain himself to keep the kiss going. Fuckin' height differences. They broke apart for a millisecond before going back into it. Gordon was basically straddling Tommy, his arms wrapped around his neck and Tommy's hands on his hips. They long since tuned out the music completely and only focused on each other. All that mattered was each other's breathing, each other's heartbeats, everything.   
Before he knew it Tommy woke up on the couch, arms wrapped around Gordon and the clock reading 6 A.M. Fuck.

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Gordon didn't remember much that happened the night before other than dancing with Tommy and then waking up on the couch alone. But whatever happened between them couldnt've been good. Tommy was gone and wasn't answering any of Gordon's texts. He tried not to think about it. Maybe he was just, busy. He did want to hang out with Darnold, maybe he just wanted to focus on his friend. He needed to stop instantly going to the bad. But he couldn't help it, especially with Tommy. They both cared about each other more than anyone else, they always made sure to text each other whenever they went out or just for dumb reasons. Tommy leaving Gordon on read just didn't feel right to him, how could it? He sighed as he sat up from the cushions, letting his bones crack. Maybe feeling less stiff will help, at least a bit.   
The morning routine felt, off. He was alone. No one to make breakfast for, no one to sit with him and drink coffee, no one to joke with. Everything about this felt like weights on his shoulders and heart. Maybe he could just, run to the store earlier than planned. They didn't do grocery shopping until Fridays but, what harm could it do doing it on a Wednesday? Yeah, he'd do that. But not after he'd impulsively text Tommy about what he was doing. This sucked man.

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"You did *what?!*" Darnold exclaimed as they almost spit out their drink. "I, I didn't know what I was doing! It just- it. It happened and, and now I don't know what to do!" Tommy shoved his head into his hands and let out a sigh. Brunch suddenly didn't sound like a great idea. "Talk to him! Dr. Freeman is probably worried sick, and I know ignoring him isn't going to help." They placed their hands near Tommy, trying to signal that they wanted to hold them. "Tommy. I know you don't want to. But you have to, especially now. You kissed him, did you not? And he didn't pull away?"   
"...He didn't, no."  
"See? He stayed up with you after everyone had left, he wanted to dance with you, Tommy."  
He looked at them, placing his hands on theirs. Darnold made sure Tommy knew they weren't lying. Their expression showed nothing but sincerity. "I'll. I'll talk to him, I promise."  
"Promise promise?"  
"Promise promise."  
"Good, now." They squeezed Tommy's hands before letting go and grabbing their fork. "Eat before your food gets cold."

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Tommy stood outside the apartment, hand hovering over the door handle. He was going to tell him, he promised. He took a deep breath in and opened the door, hoping Gordon was in the shower or napping. Sadly, he was on the couch already looking at the door. "Hey." Is all he could say.  
There was a silence between them before Gordon got up and walked over towards the other. "I was worried sick, why didn't you answer me all day?" He looked, hurt which made this so much worse. "I."   
"Tommy, please. Be honest with me, am I fucking up? I, I want to be a good friend but please tell me if I'm doing something that hurts you." With ever sentence he got closer to Tommy and reached out his hand. He impulsively took it and placed it onto his own face, leaning into it and letting tears flow out of his closed eyes.  
"T-Tommy?" But Tommy didn't reply. He stood there in silence and Gordon shifted so they'd both be more comfortable.   
He opened his eyes and made eye contact with Gordon, trying his best not to have his vision water up again. "I. I need to tell you something."  
"Well, obviously."  
"Promise you won't hate me, that this won't change anything between us for the worse?"  
"I promise, nothing could make me hate you, dude."  
Tommy took another deep breath in and opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Fuck it, he knew another way to get the point across.  
He quickly swooped down and made contact with Gordon's lips, moving his hands onto the back of his head. Gordon's eyes shot open with surprise but after a bit he closed them as well, wrapping his arms around Tommy's waist. Neither of them wanted to break away and it was clear, they were also both crying. The kiss wasn't perfect but to them? It was everything. This is all they wanted for months, every glance at breakfast, every joke told late at night, every movie night, every game night, every dance, all put into this one kiss. Tommy couldn't help but smile against the other's lips which eventually broke them apart. They didn't say anything they just looked into each other's eyes, letting their tears fall. "Yes." Gordon said suddenly.   
"What?"  
"Yes. I've been wanting to do that as long as you have."  
"You, you have?"  
"Of course, man! You're, you. And maybe I didn't realise it right away but," Gordon moved his hand to Tommy's arm and pulled it down to hold his Hand. "I really. Really wanted to kiss you. And, I wouldn't mind if you did it again."  
Tommy let out a sigh laugh before leaning again, making sure to make this kiss a little more enjoyable for their faces. They just stood their, bodies and lips pressed together. They'd talk about what they were later but for now, they were content with whatever was going on. They knew they'd end up making something official by the end of the night.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for not posting!!! schools been a fuckin mess and I havent had motivation to finish anything i write. also I'll prolly draw fanart for my own fic over at frenreylatta on insta and enbyseer on tumblr!


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